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Despondency

It creeps in, sometimes, and sometimes it is with reason at others without. In my case it is not so much dejection and hopelessness it is anger at self for procrastination and for finding excuses to blanket over my shortcomings and bad decisions. Hindsight is terrible unless it is consciously made to work in one's favor by extracting only the learnings and not letting the bitter tastes into one's brain, leave alone the stage where one has to "spit it out". It takes some doing. It's got to.

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Quotes

I don't think of the past. The only thing that matters is the everlasting present. W. Somerset Maugham Ralph Waldo Emerson - "To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment."

Money

By Pink Floyd Excellent song. The lyrics pertain to (most probably) the group's experience itself. As such, it is funny and humorous, poking fun at the system of media barons and "chart" economics.  I relate to it even more these days, when all I need is money. I am at peace, content, moksha-esque, even - but I do need money for subsistence. Which reminds me , how do I monetize my writings? Time to fire up the Vaio. 
keep the mind occupied. working all the time, not letting it wander back to the sordid fact of having to face this place for a whole month. especially that fact. thirty days of...of...i don't know what and what's more, i don't WANT to know. i wish i had an escape from this.